Hiking in Guantánamo like a revolutionary
Man, you had to be committed to become a part of a revolution. I would have been out of the revolution almost immediately.
Stone Cold Sober in the Havana Airport
If I’m at an airport and I’m not drunk then what am I even doing? Having a bar is literally my only criteria to highly rate an airport.
Planning my Funeral on the way to Cuba
As you all know, this whole Cuba trip is really just an unnecessarily elaborate suicide attempt. Should I return dead, this party is going to be a SWEET FUCKIN’ WAKE!