media fiasco!

Oh is this blog still here my bad I forgot about it since I am pretty much slipping into the oblivion of alcoholism. Also I quit smoking but it was accidental because when you don’t hang out in bars all the time smoking loses appeal.

I just admitted that I no longer do something that I previously enjoyed. HELLO CRY FOR HELP. If I go get some Zoloft I could probably be snorting it by this time tomorrow. It will be a miraculous cure and I would maybe not kill a bartender and eat him and then try to steal his job.

my delusions of grandeur totally make me believe that being the top story on CNN after I do this would be the highlight of my life.

I bet Fox would imply that I was a deviant lesbian cracksmoker. Pfizer would make me an example that their drug does not brainwash people because would a brainwashed person have the creativity to kill someone and eat them? No I don’t think so. In court I will testify that I would have been too crippled with depression and self doubt to get out of bed if it weren’t for the Zoloft.

Probably the jury will turn and find me guilty when the prosecutor reveals while cross examining me that in fact I never actually took Zoloft, I only had fantasies of snorting it on my blog. The public defender will scream facts not in evidence your honor and move for a mistrial but since everyone is devious and corrupt he would be overruled.

I would go to jail but Pfizer will still put a disclaimer on their bottles that says THIS PRODUCT IS NOT INTENDED FOR INTRANASAL DELIVERY.

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