Stem Cell Research

Stem Cell research is one of the most polarizing issues of our time. This debate pits science against God and is argued mostly in the political arena. Stem cell research sacrifices the lives of zygotes in order to potentially save more “important” lives. The implication of ignoring this murderous trend will ultimately lead to the annihilation of mankind.

Stem cells are typically harvested from a fertilized human zygote. That’s just fancy jargon for an embryo. An embryo is just a baby that resembles a cute little tadpole. There is practically no difference between a zygote and a child except for a heart and brains and a few other unimportant vital organs. Typically, the cells are collected from 1-3 day old samples that were fertilized in an IVF clinic. The collection often results in the destruction of the zygote. Instead of discarding the unused potential life, “science” seeks instead to save that life only to degrade and manipulate it.

“Scientists” claim that the source of the cells’ unlimited potential lies in a magical ability to be developed into any other type of cell. Supposedly, these little babies can become brain cells, heart cells, or nerve cells. They can then be coaxed to repair the brain of a person with a damaged or diseased brain. This idea is both unfounded and unproven. It is simply a ludicrous theory just as that of evolution.

Christians are exceptional people because they are going to heaven. God delivers his message to them and the message is that only the devil can perform magic. This is why Harry Potter and magical brain-repairing stem cells are agents of Satan! God also doesn’t like it when “scientists” turn his miracle IVF babies into little clumps of heart cells.

“Scientists” argue that by researching stem cells they could perform good deeds such as curing Parkinson’s or Alzheimer’s disease. These things sound good, but in reality they are bad because God only gives diseases to people that he doesn’t love. He never makes Christian people sick, which is why they never need to use “scientific” potions like pimple cream or insulin. They also mistakenly believe that doing good things like curing diseases or saving lives is what makes you go to heaven. This is patently untrue. Did Jesus ever kill babies to cure the lepers? No!

The idea that this magical stem cell baby-killing machine will save lives by curing diseases is propaganda. It is clearly a lie that serves only to deceive the masses into consent. The abominable practice intends to facilitate the holy grail of science: repairing injured or severed spinal cords.

Magical restoration of spinal nerve tissue will seem noble at first. In this dark future Christians alone will be aware that this “science” of magical repair is inherently evil because it is capacitated with the blood of unborn children. It will continue only because misguided followers will blissfully proclaim that “science” has allowed them to walk again. This false prophet will be overwhelmingly hailed while the teachings of Jesus are blatantly ignored.

Years of this Godless anarchy will come to pass before the first human head transplant is successfully performed. By then the resemblance of this procedure to Mary Shelley’s fiction won’t seem as obvious. Another quadriplegic heathen is restored! Each false miracle will restore faith in “science” and it will be ignorantly allowed to continue using logic as some kind of rationalization.

True Christians will abhor this operation because of the destruction of human souls. Stem cells are sacred because life begins at conception and therefore, a soul is conceived at the time of fertilization. Every piece of a human is inhabited by a piece of a soul. By killing a zygote you kill the soul housed by that life. Therefore, by removing a body from its head you effectively divide the soul. The body from which the head is removed will never come to rest or walk with the savior in the kingdom of heaven.

The head transplant will become wildly popular among sinners. Rich people will have their brains removed seeking eternal life inside that of a younger body. People will have the ability to change their race and gender. The indications for weight loss surgery will be endless. Imagine, a world where people are forced to pass judgment on others based on intellect alone? Social standards will be considerably stunted by this complete removal of class, race and sex boundaries.

Hybrid humans with gruesome neck scars and only half a soul will soon populate the earth. Their decapitated heads will rest upon a reanimated human body devoid of consciousness. A new race of these superior beings will be borne upon our planet and will be collectively referred to as the children of science. Christians will refer to them as Satan’s Army.

At some point rapid brain degeneration will occur in these unnatural freaks of science. The previously innocuous hybrids will have to somehow restore their rapidly deteriorating brains or face extinction. The only way to repair a decomposing brain is to develop an insatiable hunger for the brains of the living. At this point the humans who have not been scarred with the mark of the devil will become prey and sustenance for the omnipotent demons.

The earth will become hunting grounds for “scientific” beings that can only be described as zombies. Mankind will be eradicated in a horror film fashion. God will look down upon us and see what we have become and cancel the rapture in shame and disappointment. We will be left with only “science” to replace him. The Earth will then literally become hell. It will all be because of stem cell research.

Overwhelming proof exists that the religion of science is the anti-Christ. These “scientists” vindicate themselves with education and justify their actions by saving and improving human lives. They have taken steps towards gaining public approval for their vile actions already with their silly dialysis machines, instant messaging, corn dogs and global warming. Dangerous promises like stem cells and technical explanations about why a zygote is not a baby have confused the facts. To prevent the damning consequences of “science” the Christians must act or face the disproval of God!

It will be too late once zombies roam free eating brains and degrading the human race even further. If the religion of “science” is to be stopped then early action is a necessity. Discontinuing stem cell research is not just good for the baby stem cell tadpoles; it is good for mankind!


  1. oh yeah. I totally took this in to the writing center and they told me my paper was shit. Because I wasn’t using FACTS. ha ha ha ha ha ha.

    I’m sorry. Religion is fake. What do you want me to do about it?

  2. thank god sarah palin will be president once the mccain dies of old age or alzheimers or heat stroke or whatever the fuck it is that old people die of, because she’ll put a stop to the dead babies and pronto.

    i just hope she puts down that retard baby of hers. no one wants to see that.

  3. I would like to officially nominate you for President in 2008…

    I know you’ll keep us safe from the evil religion of science and that evil Harry potter!

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