When they asked “who said ‘Houston, we have a problem’?” everyone said Tom Hanks. That’s how I know the moon landing was fake.
People once trusted the U.S. government so much that we let them strap people to intercontinental ballistic missiles and blast them into space. Now no one believes in masks. Pretty amazing what we’ve managed to accomplish in just a few short decades.
That awkward moment when you make a new friend and then they ruin the relationship by saying “Let’s Go Brandon.” That’s what the entire state of Florida feels like. Looks nicer from space.
Merry Christmas to everyone who gets my sense of humor!
The CDC says that fully vaccinated people can now be feared by the townspeople and disappear into the woods never to be seen again. Just do not insult the bats.
Every painting ever painted is actually of a possum. Every place you look there is INTENSE POSSUM DRAMA! You just have to have faith and he will appear all around you.
When another friend moves away and you need to express your feelings.