the bus fair is unpaid.

We were supposed to have some crazy insane white boy rappers last night and it was going to be all off the hook and crackery and we were going to have a race war and some fights and hopefully someone would maybe even get shot and I was going to make 8 million dollars because […]

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cutter bloodbath extravaganza!

So this weekend we booked some death metal bands from LA for white night. And they were pretty much some kids who grew up in the suburbs like probably someplace that starts with the word Rancho del whatever and is 80 miles north of the actual Los Angeles. But you know, they’ve got angst. I […]

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smack that

Then the owner of my bar was like I think I will get you all shirts with our logo on them so we can have uniforms. And we were seriously like IT WOULD BE SO EMBARASSING TO ADVERTISE THIS PLACE. Because it is pretty much embarrassing to tell people where I work because people feel […]

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eminem better not be ruined forever

If you offered me anything, even something really good like a brand new Astin Martin or world peace or like a record deal… and all I had to do in exchange was re-live the past week… I would not only say no but also I would probably shoot you in the face because this past […]

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text messages: nobdy dies on white nite

cook: so when I was leaving work I noticed a bunch of cops and an ambulance in our alley. me: so? cook: so I think someone died in our alley. me: no way. cook: what you don’t think that shit could happen? me: not tonight. cook: why not? me: tonight was white night. This has […]

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welcome wagon

We got this new bartender a while back and his name was Dante. But we never called him that we called him the amazing Dante or Dante the incredible or whatever because he always would miss the bus and that was always his excuse always. He couldn’t even think of a new excuse each time […]

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