So today it was a hundred.and.fucking.seven
or some shit.
WHAT THE FUCK. I think when we came to vegas they accidentally flew us to a special place in hell thats like too close to the sun with a lot of fucking cocroaches or some shit like that because this is fucking FUCKED.
So my transformation into a vagrant criminal has begun because today instead of job hunting I just went to get a fucking beer because I seriously only drink beer when the temperature hits FUCKING MAGMA and I think today may have qualified since when I turned on the air conditioning in my car it immediately made this noise that sounded like it was saying ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME YOU SELFISH BITCH, YOU WANT ME DRIVE YOU AAANNNNNNNNDDDD FAN YOUR LAZY ASS??? And so the a/c was shit and my fucking makeup melting off my face. AND I AM NOT EVEN JOKING ABOUT THAT LAST PART, THIS IS SOME SERIOUS SHIT.
Anyway so I stopped for a beer and then I got drunk and started throwing plastic cups at the bartender because I hate fucking DUDE bartenders because thats just wrong for men to make drinks while I remain jobless and boozeless also with no money to buy booze! WHAT THE FUCK GOD? I think thats called discrimination.
Then I told him how fucking sexy he was with his shirt tucked halfway in and halfway out with his little skull belt buckle because that belt buckle was seriously some funny ass shit. And then I got his number and text messaged him a message that said “u suck” and he totally got it while I was sitting there and complained to me that people text him stupid shit like that all day long and he doesn’t fucking understand why. And I was like “get a fucking life dude because you just give your number to strange girls in the bar who fucking call your back fat sexy and throw plastic cups at you maybe thats why they text message you stupid shit all fucking day long, did you ever think of that? WELL DID YOU?” Of course I said all that shit in my head and on the outside I just fucking laughed and laughed like a drunk imbecile.
This has been a post from my former blog from when I was cooler. Or at least when I was younger Viva La Crap!